A message to my kids

Hey kids, these things are the OPPOSITE of helpful, thought you should know...

1) When I say "excuse me" and without looking, you move MORE into the way.

2) When I'm struggling to get out the front door with a giant bag of garbage, and just as I get through, you yell "HEY MOM! Look at this!" or "WATCH ME MOM!!"

3) When you all talk at the same time. I can't hear more than one conversation at a time, and sometimes not even that.

4) When I'm reading, typing, thinking, and you walk into the room talking and expect me to have heard everything you said and respond accordingly.

5) When I am dropping stuff, and trying to keep hold and I say "SOMEBODY HELP ME!" and you stand there, looking at me and say "With what?"